Spare Me.

What is this chill inside?
The one a soft blanket can't fix
Though I wrap it around

It is pilled and shabby
Hardly enough against the slippery ice
I slipped on
Oh so fast
Sliding until it was
Brought to an end
You'll get over it
Time heals it all
Yeah, I've heard it all
Until I'm deaf

But I felt the tenderness
The deep sight in the eyes
The longing, and then the respite
(At least until we each had to return to our own houses)

Warm, tender, soft
What is this absence?
This absence keeps you awake at night

Then greets you in the morning like a naughty child,

Jumping on the bed
It's trying to forget
But not being able to
It's seeing all those places
Those memories
And pictures that taunt

Reminding you daily
That that person is not there
That they no longer care
That they took stock of you...
And let you go

It's seeing the pieces fall and scatter

Like that sand I shook out of the beach towel
And strangely the haunting absence of feeling itself
You choose to smile
And when you cannot force one, paint one on with lipstick
I have these vivid dreams
That people come back
In my dreams, they seem so close

And when I wake, I look for them
Until I see the sunlight
Cast long and narrow lines on my walls

And I remember
And I realize that another day
Is starting...

And I have to go to work.